The Murder of Rachel Nickell 2026 * * Stars

EXECUTION NOT WARRANTED 

"Dadda, can you help me draw mummy on this piece of paper?" So says a two-year-old witness in The Murder of Rachel Nickell, a documentary that seems to want to dredge up something that happened almost 34 years ago. Um, let the victim's family be at peace will ya. And yeah, let's not now bother the dude that was falsely accused of Nickell's horrific passing via good old '92. Yeesh.

So OK, "Rachel Nickell" was directed by feature rookie Lucy Bowden, a woman who might have been swayed by Netflix's final, abrupt cutting. I mean why is the actual killer of Rachel revealed in the last five minutes on a whim? And why does little Alex Hanscombe now an adult (see first paragraph), suddenly show up in the last twenty minutes or so only to give very little insight into how his mum got stabbed 49 times a la broad daylight? And um, why was father Andre Hanscombe (Nickell's partner) so camcorder crazy that everything his fam did had to be so cataloged. Oh wait, it was the 90s. My bad. 

Bowden, well she gives The Murder of Rachel Nickell a sterile, streamlined look, interspersed with what seems like prepped interviews, grainy archives, and slight reenactments. The editing is yardstick, the musical score by Andrew Skeet is mildly stirring, and "Rachel Nickell" has gained enough reverence to the point where it has also been made into an actual TV series (with real actors). "I saw it... Yeah I saw it all." Not so fast boss. Not so fast. 

In closure, The Murder of Rachel Nickell fails however to be novel, or fresh, or anything other than humdrum existing. I mean it's like watching a combination of Dateline or 20/20 or even paranormal drama A Haunting, where instead of the camera readily peeking in we get something that's a little pat and/or smarmy. "Murder unincorporated."

Written by Jesse Burleson

Faces of Death 2026 * * * Stars

DEATH PROVED

It was 1978 and no one had seen the likes of something like Faces of Death. Um, just like no one had seen the likes of The Exorcist and/or Pink Flamingos (yikes). Despite a critic's ribbing and decent box office receipts, "Death" still gained cult status, showing footage of different ways humans could bite that proverbial dust. 48 years later we have a revamping of Faces of Death titled well, Faces of Death (naturally). People are still getting executed, the flick is still pseudo mondo, the budget is still nil, and the antagonist is still "killing for no apparent reason." "Flag it, and move on." As if we could boss. As if we could. 

Reflecting on various horror pics of the past and near present, Faces of Death (starring Barbie Ferreira and Dacre Montgomery) won't set the world on fire but it's perfectly passable as screenlife, snuff fodder. Beheading-s and shootings and home invasions and electrocutions oh my! "Death's" runtime is 105 minutes, the soundtrack reeks of John Harrison (that's a good thing), and unseasoned director Daniel Goldhaber thinks in cuts with his hyper-cutting giving Faces of Death a rather nimble pace. "Give the people what they want." Fo sho. Fo...sho.

So OK, don't go into "Death" thinking it's a documentary like '78's original version, with unknown actors and ultimately mealy footage. No Faces of Death is modern-day, only reverting back to the super-sounded 70s as a veritable springboard. I mean I've only seen the trailer of the first Faces of Death and there's no graininess here, just a sort of triple hybrid of Silence of the Lambs, Saw, and some Sam Raimi vestige on the low. Fairly well done, not as gory as I thought, saddled with building tension, and made for the millennial-s who like their Internet fabric spoon-fed to them. Flushed "faces."  

Written by Jesse Burleson

Maternal Instinct 2026 * * Stars

GUTTED FEELING 

A queasy documentary that shows what happens when you combine Dateline and Cold Case Files with a little Jerry Springer (yikes). Yeah I'm talking about 2026's Maternal Instinct, not to be confused with '92's Basic Instinct, that Dutch vehicle from a few years back, or that badly-panned thriller starring Sir Anthony Hopkins. "Maternal", well it's another yardstick Netflix nuance, exploiting those social media outlets like Facebook and Instagram and I guess Pinterest (hey I'm just spitballing here). 

So OK, was "Maternal's" subject Taylor Parker really pregnant despite having a hysterectomy? And did Tay Tay really claim that she accidently killed her best bud to retrieve her unborn tyke? And uh, what's up with the unusual change in appearance via the trial Taylor? I mean I hardly recognized ya.

Anyway Maternal Instinct is shot in the normal video on-demand style, not groundbreaking or completely stirring but not too low-resolution either. Directed by ten-year vet Jessica Dimmock (TV's Home, The Pearl), "Maternal" gives you recent archives and bodycam footage and non-filtered interviews, fashioning the Texas families and friends involved as guests on a trashy talk show (see first paragraph). "Coming from a small town you can trust easy." Can you boss? Can you for reals?

America's favorite streaming service and potty-mouthed accounts aside, Maternal Instinct is well-shot by Dimmock and well-edited by one Carter Gunn (he of 30 for 30 fame). The problem with "Maternal" however, is who it's sensationalizing which is current death row inmate Taylor Parker. I mean this girl should remain anonymous, like those randoms who commit school shootings on the low. Parker is a walking spam alert, the ultimate catfish-er, the ultimate house pourer, the ultimate death of acceptable social networking (no pun intended). Giving her any kind of forum (vocal or non-vocal) or even her own flick for that matter is just plain awry. Last "instinct". 

Written by Jesse Burleson

Backrooms 2026 * * 1/2 Stars

ROOM WITH NO VIEW

A one-word title for a movie, more creepy than scary, numbing with some serious wide shots, almost Kubrickian. Yeah I'm talking about 2026's Backrooms, a flick so destitute and grainy you need special lenses just to view it. So OK, is Backroom's main character Clark cray cray or just having a real bad dream? And how does someone fail at architecture only to become a furniture store owner? And uh, what's up with the deformed dude with nine eyes? "What did you find?" Oh wouldn't you like to know. 

So yeah, there must have been a boatload of vast set designs on Backrooms. I mean the vehicle is called Backrooms for a reason so there you go. And rookie director Kane Parsons obviously saw his share of Blair Witch/Paranormal Activity flicks, what with all the low budgets and found footage stuff and you know, claustrophobia. Somewhere Oren Peli is calling and guess what, he says he wants his control of independent features back. Natch. 

Heather Donahue personas and Katie Featherston mantras aside, you want a pseudo horror pic about getting lost in interconnected, physical enclosures that's way too complex for its own good? Well you'll probably get that with Backrooms. And do you want to see something where the images will creep you out but at the same time you'll be scratching your proverbial head, wishing everything could just be played out as a straight thriller? Prego, it's in there with Backrooms. And finally, do you want to see star Chiwetel Ejiofor (as Clark mentioned earlier) doing local TV, pirate commercials at his empty outlet? Uh, neither do I. 

All in all, Backrooms in terms of its panache is a helmer's triumph, a mosaic of harrowing, three-dimensional imagery and labyrinthine camera setups. As a mode of storytelling however, the film has a lot to be desired. I mean Backrooms might require repeated viewings but that doesn't mean it's a horror/art masterpiece of atmospheric drama and dread. "Imagine describing a dog to someone who's never seen one before and then asking them to draw it." You said it shrink Kline not me. 

Written by Jesse Burleson

Untold: The Shooting at Hawthorne Hill 2026 * * Stars

FOOLS ON THIS HILL

"Your whole life revolves around this one thing." Yup, they're talking about an equestrian student who gets shot by her Olympic mentor in the stomach and God's knows where else. Uh, how the heck did we get here? Insanity plea? Yikes.

Anyway Untold: The Shooting at Hawthorne Hill is a Netflix documentary, unfolding like a sledgehammer and rounding out to about 63 blazing minutes. "Hawthorne Hill", well it doesn't celebrate the art of horse dressage, it nearly bypasses it and blankets it, instead focusing on an act of handgun violence where the perp is supposedly insane and the victim is kind of well, a little cray cray herself. What, did you think I was gonna mention the late Christopher Reeve, Sonny Leon, and who's the favorite in this year's Belmont Stakes? Get reals guys. 

So OK, Untold: The Shooting at Hawthorne Hill features two incredibly unlikable main subjects (Lauren Kanarek, Michael Barisone) who come off like a couple of junior high outcasts having a continuous, catfight tiff. I mean that's what makes the docu rather nettlesome mind you, a constant he said, she said, she said, he done it that wears out its welcome long before the credits come up (and said credits literally add to the melodrama). 

Yeah "Hawthorne Hill's" archives (from 2017 to 2019) are effective, yeah the interviews are aplenty, yeah Grace McNally's direction is veritably baseline, and yeah the editing is crisp as an autumn afternoon in my home state (that would be Michigan). But what's the point in having a pissing contest between Barisone and Kanarek that threatens to totally irk the audience. I mean these people would be better off bickering via a debate on CNN or participating in some congressional hearing Roger Clemens-style. Actually I would probably turn that noise off anyway. "Shoot this moon."

Written by Jesse Burleson 

Disclosure Day 2026 * * * Stars

ALIEN NATION

It was 1982 and I was drinking the cinematic Kool-Aid, going to see E.T. for the umpteenth time. Actually I'm fibbing. I mean I loved E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial, one of the greatest moviegoing experiences of my lifetime. Now 44 years later, I decided to take in Steven Spielberg's latest wildly-hyped creation, Disclosure Day. The space critters are getting exposed, the government is ticked off, and Wyatt Russell's character Jackson is completely aghast. "People have the right to know the truth." Uh, you think?

Reflecting on Spielberg vehicles of the past and near present, Disclosure Day (starring Emily Blunt and Colin Firth) is certainly not his best but it's very far from becoming his worst. In fact, the only thing it suffers from is possibly being a little too Spielbergian for its own good. You know, that overly sense of wonder and those unusual tracking shots and well, that good old sentimentality. The runtime is 145 minutes, the soundtrack is slumming John Williams, and David Koepp's screenplay is all nuts and bolts, not too cheesy but a little dated and possessing Steven's hokey touches. "What am I doing?" "What am I doing?" See what I mean?

So OK, there are critics out there who think Disclosure Day is Steven Spielberg greatest hits fodder, a rehash or reheat of his lifelong schtick. I mean maybe, what with all the War of the Worlds and Minority Report and Close Encounters of the Third Kind residue, sure. But take another look kiddies (and possibly another full viewing which is what I plan on doing) and you'll find a swiftly-paced, thinking person's drama with a couple of nifty car chases. Steven, well he still knows where to put the camera and can still spin a yarn like a pro bowler getting his throw on throwing strikes. What's even more impressive is how Stevie boy can make what's on screen feel like it could actually happen (or already has) in terms of the sci-fi untruths upending. Whole "day".  

Written by Jesse Burleson

Scary Movie 2026 * 1/2 Stars

LIKE SHOWGIRLS, ABSOLUTELY FRIGHTENING

As I entered the theater to watch 2026's Scary Movie (or in some circles, Scary Movie 6), I had a feeling it would be about as dated as Motorola Razr phones, MySpace, chunky tech, and/or Borders bookstores. Guess what, I was right. The Wayans brothers, well they are stuck in 2004, thinking that full frontal nudity, black and white jokes, pegging toys, and nonsensical slapstick matter. They don't, they really don't. But hey, these Scary Movie flicks are freaking cheap to make (at 30 mil) and their audience doesn't really care what we critics think. I just checked the box office receipts so why stop now boys. Yikes!

Now I liked the first Scary Movie from 2000. I really did. I mean it sort of broke the mold for gross-out comedies, throwing every cinematic kitsch at the dartboard hoping it would stick. Then the sequels came (2, 3, and 4) and they truly blew chunks. And after Scary Movie 5 waddled onto screens in 2013, you get the idea why studios would wait 13 years or so to put out another one. What, as if we have forgotten about the suckage? We have not. Basically '26's Scary Movie is a cash grab, edited by alleged coma patients, story boarded by drugged hyenas, and misguided as the concepts of wealth-building and fitness. "You suck, move your butt." You said it Shawn, not me. 

So yeah, here's the unenthusiastic cameos for "6": Carmen Electra, Shaquille O'Neal, Teyana Taylor, and Anthony Anderson. And here's the vehicles being spoofed: Get Out (too long ago), Smile (too brief), Weapons (too recent), and Scream 5, 6, and 7 (not memorable enough). And uh, here's the plot line: oh wait, no such luck, just a series of random scenes pasted together by some frat dudes on a rough weekend. "Disaster" movie. 

Written by Jesse Burleson

The Crash 2026 * * Stars

CLATTERED 

An icky documentary that feels like a seasoned Dateline episode with a little more panache. Yeah I'm talking about 2026's The Crash, not to be confused with that 2004 Oscar winner or David Cronenberg's moot Crash from the mid-90s. The Crash, well it's a product of a certain streaming service and it exploits those annoying social media platforms like TikTok and Insta and Twitch and gosh knows what else. So OK, did 17-year-old Mackenzie Shirilla really kill her boyfriend by way of a staged car accident? And was this girl really traveling 100 mph into a darn brick wall? And uh, what's up with the potty mouthed pandering Mackenzie? "That split second changed all of our lives forever." True dat. 

Anyway The Crash is numbingly shot by TV director Gareth Johnson, he of Shark Week and See No Evil fame. There's slight archives that look nearly like bodycam footage reenactments (even though you know they weren't), interviews from parents and the po-po that might have been coached up (and they probably were), and a certain Mayberry flavor that seems straight from the annals of Maury ("that is a lie" hint hint). "It didn't add up." Oh but it does boss. It truly does. 

Trashy talk show hosts and Podunk Americana-s aside, The Crash has its moments in terms of pacing, brisk editing, and mien when it comes to its overall slickness. I mean it appears that good old Netflix definitely put their fingerprints on this thing no matter who's behind the camera. The problem however is the vehicle's subject, a teenage Shirilla who is allowed to chew on some soggy, 15 minutes of fame mind you. She is as unlikable as any convicted, enigma-like killer in any reality, legal cinematic endeavor. And it also doesn't help that Mackenzie's parents have a weird, unconditional love for their dope-smoking, felonious felon. "Crash test dummy."  

Written by Jesse Burleson

The Mandalorian and Grogu 2026 * * * Stars

BOUNTY MAN

It was 1977 and I was a 3-year-old tyke, watching the original Star Wars at a drive-in theater with my dad until I fell asleep (during the opening freaking credits mind you). That was probably my earliest childhood memory and now 5 decades years later I'm reviewing another pic from this franchise, about a galaxy bounty hunter and his little humanoid resembling good old Yoda. The Galactic Empire has fallen, Rotta the Hunt needs to be rescued, and imperial warlords must you know, bite that imperial dust. "Before going into harm's way check your armor." Indeed.

Reflecting on Star Wars vehicles of the past and near present, 2026's The Mandalorian and Grogu is definitely an add-on, trotting out that Lucasfilm logo, featuring nasty sapient creatures, wringing in those dark hues, and getting its rev on with the occasional X-34 Landspeeder. The runtime is 132 minutes, the soundtrack is killer Kavinsky-like, and the director is Jon Favreau, he of Marvel and space Western fame. 

So OK, there are critics out there who say The Mandalorian and Grogu is generic, that there's nothing at stake cinematically. I say easy guys, just chill. I mean "Mandalorian" is a pure action flick, blaster firefights and off-road speeder pursuits and Ardennians oh my! It's like the space opera gods after seven years decided to whisper to their fanboys, "hey, come hither." 

Peter Travers wannabees and six-limb creatures aside, helmer Favreau (mentioned earlier) fashions The Mandalorian and Grogu as a rock 'em, sock 'em, Buck Rogers-ish actioner, with a look that suggests a little Blade Runner and something out of an old, Vietnam war movie from the 70s (hint hint). I recommended Solo: A Star Wars Story some years back so yeah, I don't have a problem recommending this. "Do or do not, there is no try." Natch. 

Written by Jesse Burleson

Apex 2026 * * * Stars

BLUEBIRD DAY

It's not everyday that we get a one-word titled flick with a cast of two but here we are with 2026's Apex. And um, don't even try to compare it with 2021's Apex Predators or that Bruce Willis B movie from the same year. It's much more formidable and momentous than that. Crossbows and Australian landscapes and vertical drops and cannibalism oh my! "You going out alone? I wouldn't recommend it." Yikes!

Anyhow Apex is a panoramic thriller, swallowing and gravely risky when you realize that the main personas are in the middle of some nowhere National Park, playing a severe game of barbaric cat and mouse where the cat might actually nosh on the mouse. Double yikes! 

Apex, well it's about a woman adrenaline junkie who decides to go kayaking following the death of her boyfriend on some mountain in frigid Norway. While in the grieving process, she heads across that good old International Date Line, encountering a murderous, outback local who intends to hunt her down while trifling her at the same time. Charlize Theron plays said woman (Sasha) and Taron Egerton plays said local (the false toothed Ben). Great physical acting by the always game Theron. Great emoting by the normally reticent Egerton. "I thought you liked danger." Yeah but to a point there boss. To a point. 

So OK, you're probably wondering whether or not I plan on recommending the genre-retreaded Apex, what with its non-plausible protagonist's will to live or its overreaching black hat. Well I do, and um, I will. I mean if you're into flicks like I don't know, Rust Creek or 2020's Alone or Wolf Creek then Apex will give you that habitual, cinematic fix, complete with lush Aussie cinematography, a couple of grisly images, a harrowing, grim musical score by Hogni Egilsson, and some three-dimensional horror direction from veteran Icelander Baltasar Kormakur. "Seeing summit." 

Written by Jesse Burleson